I am a big 'ol nerd.

And I am ok with it.

One of the ways my nerdiness manifests itself is through listening to podcasts. And I listen to a LOT of podcasts. I love it! I've got some British humor (The Bugle and The Ricky Gervais Podcast), some politics (NPR: It's All Politics and Meet the Press), some economics (Freakonomics and NPR: Planet Money), some culture (Relevant Podcast and NPR: All Songs Considered), some religion (Tony Campolo Podcast and On Being with Krista Tippett [Relevant fits here too]), and even some general miscellany (Stuff You Should Know, This American Life, WNYC's Radiolab, and The Moth). I even listen to debates (Intelligence Squared UK and Intelligence Squared US)! And they are all amazing!

(Before you worry that I spend all of my time glued to my iPod, I pick and choose episodes of a few of these. I do have a life. Unfortunately.)

So today I was listening to On Being with Krista Tippett (formerly Speaking of Faith, for all of my fellow NPR nerds out there) and she was conducting an interview with Civil Rights leader Dr. Vincent Harding. The title of the show was "Civility, History, and Hope", which immediately intrigued me because this is something that I have been really concerned about in this current political climate. It is really sad to me to see people who claim to be followers of Christ who are so vitriolic and spew such hatred for our elected leaders. I get not being happy with what is happening. I get wanting someone to not hold an office. I get even passionately opposing someone's views. But what I do not get is the rage and the personal attacks against individuals, specifically the President. I am living at the moment in a bastion of conservatism, so I hear a lot of flat out crazy and mean things. Stuff I would never ever allow a kid in my classroom to say about another kid, so why should we be saying it about the President? Last time I read through the red letters in the Bible, Jesus never bashed the authorities (who he KNEW WERE GOING TO KILL HIM) or compared anyone to Hitler. If you are so mad about it, pray pray pray for him, not just at him. It is amazing how God softens your heart when you pray for someone.

Wow, did not mean to go on a rant there. Sorry!

Anyway, this episode was great. If you have some free time, or need something to listen to while you drive, this is a worthy download. Dr. Harding talks a lot about the importance of story and encouraging youth to seek out the wisdom of elders, all in the goal of creating the "beloved community" that Martin Luther King, Jr. spoke so often of. You can get it on iTunes, or at http://being.publicradio.org/programs/2011/civility-history-hope/ . There were a couple of specific things that really stood out to me:

:: We are absolutely amateurs at this matter of building a democratic nation made up of many, many peoples, of many kinds, from many connections and convictions and from many experiences. And to know how, after all the pain that we have caused each other, to carry on democratic conversation that in a sense invites us to hear each other's best arguments and best contributions so that we can then figure out how do we put these things together to create a more perfect union.

:: [On comparing the political climate of the 1960's and today] My sense is that, in the '60s, there was probably a larger kind of canopy of hope that we could see and we could identify and that people could name and focus on. Now we are in particular spots, locations, sometimes seemingly isolated, but I feel that there are points, focal situations, where that is still available and where people are operating from that.

So I think that it is not simply the matter of hope or no hope. I have a feeling that one of the deeper transformations that's going on now is that for the white community of America, there is this uncertainty growing about its own role, its own control, its own capacity to name the realities, that it has moved into a realm of uncertainty that it did not allow itself to face before.

And I think that that's the place that we are in and that's even more the reason why we've got to figure out what was King talking about when he was seeing the possibility of a beloved community and recognized that maybe for some of us that cannot come until some of us realize that we must give up what we thought was only ours in the building of a beloved nation. Can there be a beloved nation? Why don't we try and see?

Mmmm. Especially that last paragraph. "We must give up what we thought was only ours in the building of a beloved nation."

This struck me as being about so much more than race, and so much more than just a renewing of civility in America. This is Kingdom work. I am encouraged to know many Christians who are doing this with their lives, and hope and pray pray pray that more will join.

(This post serves both as a pondering point and as a recommendation for several new podcasts. Happy listening!)

Drum Roll Please...

So... I got my score! I got a 158, which for this test was in the 75th percentile. I am not terribly pleased, but I am not terribly upset either. Let me break it down:

Good: The 75th percentile is the cut-off for a lot of scholarships, and it certainly is not a shabby score. I have already received emails from several schools who think I may be a good fit with my score, my GPA, and my demographic info. So that's good. Also, a 158 means that at FSU, I won't have to take the GRE, which is HUGE. And for someone who has been out of school for 4 years and hasn't taken a standardized test in longer than that, not too shabby.

Bad: This score doesn't really set me apart from others. I was really hoping to break 160. I probably won't get into UF with this score, which is the school closest to St. Augustine. :(

So, a mixed bag. More good than bad though, so I am ok with it. Now I am working on my essays and finishing up my applications. More to come later...

*Sniff, sniff*

So, I am sick. Is anyone surprised? I didn't go to work today, since supervising kids is pretty much the worst thing to do when one isn't feeling 100%. My Mom is also feeling under the weather, more so than me- she was diagnosed with bronchitis this morning. Dad is in Memphis working, so she and I are taking the opportunity to be lazy and mopey. It is pretty nice.

Things have been pretty busy at both of my jobs lately. I have been averaging 45 kids in my room daily for homework at Club, so my classroom management skills have been exercised thoroughly! Friday and Saturday we have all day training in Knoxville with Clubs from Tennessee, Kentucky, and North Carolina, so hopefully I will pick up some good tips. I really really love the staff I work with. They have been so thoughtful and willing to jump in wherever needed. This is a HUGE BLESSING. I was actually thinking the other day about how I am living what I thought was my "worst case scenario" after coming back from Haiti, and it really could be way way worse.

Bath and Body Works is. I mean, again, it could be way worse, but I am looking forward to being done with it. It's retail, and I am just not a fan. Again, I work with some pretty great girls there as well, so that makes it easier.

As a little plug, the new candles are AMAZING. Way better than Yankee Candles! My new favorite is the Caribbean Salsa:

What a good little corporate shill I am. :)

I get my LSAT score on Monday. Yipes! I am pretty nervous about it. During the test, I thought I did pretty well, and found it easier than most of my preparation material. But of course, that could be a sign that I did really well or a sign that I totally bombed it. We will all find out on Monday. Meanwhile, I am working on finishing up my applications. I am just ready for it all to be done and decided, but I never was great at being patient.

Sad news- I thought I was going to get to come to FL for a few days in May, but I misunderstood the meaning of "The Boys and Girls Club Summer Shut-down." Apparently, that just means that we will have no kids, and that we will be working that whole week. So, just kidding. I am not sure when I will get to come, but you can bet that it will be not very long after Titus Sivyer makes his appearance. :) I am very very excited that I will get to take a couple of days off to celebrate my best buddy Kim's wedding in May, but she has not gotten the memo that she should live in Florida, so the blessed event will take me to Mississippi.

I guess that's all. This isn't very eloquently worded or exciting, but I did want to give a little update. Let me just say that I LOVE HEARING FROM PEOPLE.

HINT, HINT.

*Sniff*